Kain's Domain

Hey, all. As I'm sure you've noticed from all the posts that have gone missing, I am closing up the domain. Well, it'll remain, but it's not going to be active.

You see, I started the blog back in June of 2005. It was an experiment, really. I wanted to see if I would be able to meet a nice girl and start a relationship, by way of posting about my life in a blog. By letting my readers into my life, perhaps there might be a girl out there who thought me and my life would be interesting enough to be a part of. The goal was to see if I could accomplish this in one year and one month (deadline: my 30th birthday on June 30, 2006.)

So I wrote, and I wrote everything that happened to me in my life. I wrote about my new job and the people and situations I encountered, I wrote about what happened when I was out and about, I wrote about the videogames or DVDs I had purchased, sales I had taken advantage of, as well as posting online quiz results, music lyrics, quotes, and memes. I used my writing skills to not only document my life and feelings, but to make it entertaining.

However, about a month and a half after starting this blog, I made a rookie mistake. I was befriended by a girl at work who also had a blog (over at LiveJournal) and I shared URLs with her. Little did I know at the time that she was a complete psychotic tramp who did not trust men. After breaking up with her boyfriend who she claimed was stalking her, she turned her sights on me.

The problems escalated, due to the fact that our office has more cliques than a middle school, and this girl was one of the queen bees. In the blink of an eye, rumors and accusations flew, and even worse, she had given them the URL to my blog. Everyone believed they knew who I was based on the lies she told them and the words I had written in a simple blog.

Her and her clique would get together once a month for dinner, and talk badly about the people outside the clique, and I had quickly gotten to be a popular topic of ridicule. When the office tramp, the mean-spirited dirty-old-man who considers every girl in the office "eye candy", and the two-faced wolf-in-sheep's-clothing get together with their entourage, the well-mannered gentleman, like myself, doesn't stand a chance.

They made my life Hell in the office, and I spiraled into a deep depression. I considered several choices. I could stop writing about work in my blog (which, unfortunately, would mean lack of content since it is the place where the most action is,) or I could close down my journal and open it elsewhere where I could limit who could see the posts (which really goes against the whole goal of the experiment.) I chose a different solution: I could give them something to talk about.

Because I'm a writer, in late January, I started a fictional storyline in which I met a girl outside our building and began a torrid love affair with her. I created a girl out of thin air and gave her life. She had a back-story and motives and emotions. I named her Zöe (Which means "Life") and revealed bits and pieces of her personality as the days went by. I fit these fictional encounters with her into my real-life day. When it was time for lunch break, I would go outside and walk the perimeter of the parking lot to get exercise. But in my blog, I was somewhere with Zöe, making out in her car or out to lunch.

The pay-off was that these co-workers, who were prying into my life by reading my blog, were believing the stories. Despite that fact that I left several clues in most of the posts that everything was completely fake. For example, the car she drove was a "Volkswagon Ichleige" ("Ich leige" is German for "I lie.") One post, if you read it straight down the left side, clearly read "Secret Info: Zoe is Fictional." Even the very first post that I made about her stated that I had made an imaginary friend.

Regardless, they would head off looking for me on my lunch break to see if if they can catch a glimpse of Zöe, and by the time I got home to write the blog, I would naturally have an excuse as to why I wasn't with her when they saw me. The most fun occurred the day after Valentine's Day, which was the first time Zöe and I "made love." The dirty-old-man gathered the bunch of them around the file cabinets and told them while they all kept glancing in my direction. When he told the psycho girl who got me into this mess in the first place, I actually saw her point in my direction and could see her mouth the words, "He did that!?"

After this, I really added heat and mild erotica to the relationship; soon we were going at it in her car in the parking lot, sneaking into the men's room for a quickie, etc. Some of the snooping co-workers actually tried to get me in trouble for having sex on office property, but since I was not actually doing so and there was no such girl, their frustration grew when they could get no real proof that I was actually doing as they suggest.

But the storyline came to a close on April 1st (April Fools Day) and I think, as a result, I had less problems with most of the clique from that point on. It definitely showed me who I could trust and who I couldn't. Today, most of the people in the clique are gone. The psycho girl left the office the following Halloween, and it's funny, but now three years later, her best friend at the time, the mother of her Godchild, talks to me now a lot more than her. And practically everyone else has gotten new jobs or retired.

Unfortunately, my deadline came and went, and the experiment was unsuccessful. I did not have the reader base to meet a girl and start a relationship. After my 30th birthday, I got pretty bummed out and did not feel up to the blog anymore. I tried, I honestly did, but I just did not feel there was anything worth writing about, so most of the time I would pop in every so often and talk about the latest games or DVDs I got, and then I'd go silent for a couple months.

Perhaps the blog wasn't the best place to meet someone. Since then, I had tried dating sites like eHarmony, and even attempted to use MySpace, and came away empty-handed. I just turned 32 last week, I've had this blog for a little over three years, and at the point I'm at right now, I just don't have the ambition to write blogstuffs anymore. I hate coming here just to write "this is what I bought" and then leaving, when a blog is supposed to be about what's happening in your life. But for the last couple years, nothing significant has been happening.

So I've decided to close up now. I thank those of you readers who are still out there, particularly Chlöe (I don't know how often she checks my blog or even if she does anymore, but she was a great blogfriend.) My friend Steph, who is getting married this month. And the several others who had posted here and linked to me, despite their own blogs having vanished already.

Perhaps I'll be back at some point. But until then, keep rockin' all. 'Night.

Hi there, welcome to my blog. This is my first attempt at one of these things... I originally learned how to write a website back in the summer of 1996, using pure HTML 3.2 in Notepad (Learned from a book I bought before I even had a computer.) Today, the web uses all these expansive languages such as XML and CSS, and they kind of passed me by since I lost my fascination with having a site back in late 1999. Things seem a lot easier with just making a template and posting entries, though I must admit, it feels a lot cheaper than actually going through the process of writing the site the original way.

Okay, it's time for introductions.

I live in New York (Capital District, far upstate from NYC,) and have lived here all my life. It's a nice place, we don't have all the crime you would find down in the NYC areas, but then, we also don't have much of anything else either. Sure, the nearby cities have malls, and stores, and all that. But the town I live in myself really only has fast-food places and businesses that nobody would know exists unless they actually go there.

Personality wise, I'm charming, caring, and a hopeless romantic. I'm very loyal, and like to make people happy; my friends are the most important thing in the world to me and I care about them more than anything, so I often go out of my way to do things for them. I like to make people laugh, so I crack a lot of jokes as often possible, but I also have a dark sense of humor, which means I can be very sarcastic with some of my wisecracks (but they're really all in good fun.) I can also be very sensitive and emotional, which leads to my feelings getting hurt much easier than most people, and I end up worrying a lot more when I shouldn't really need to. I also have a tendancy to get up on a soapbox about things, and can get very passionate about proving my point (expect to see this a lot in my posts.)

I'm 28 years old, though I have an old soul and a young heart. I've always been much smarter and wiser than my age. When I was in grade school, they did one of those IQ tests and they found out I was genius-level. I tend to look at things from a philosophical point of view, seeing the "big picture." However, I also seem to act much younger than I am. Not in an immature way, but in a joking, playful, charming way. Perhaps it's because I'm right-minded.

I am unfortunately still single... I'm soft-spoken and very shy, especially when it comes to girls. Which makes it hard for me to meet my dream girl. All the relationships I've had were either initiated by the girl, or I was set up by a friend. My last relationship ended nine-months ago, soon after our one-year anniversary... I was heart-broken. We were best friends previously, cared about each other deeply, and were great together. But we also had certain personality traits that conflicted with each other too much, and she decided it would be easier if we went back to just being friends.

My hobbies include:

• Playing videogames, specific genres include: Role-Playing, Fighting, Survival Horror, Arcade-Style Racing, and Adventure games. I also prefer 2D games to 3D games, believe it or not. It's not that I love 3D less, it's just that I love 2D more.
• Watching movies and television, specific genres include: Horror/Thriller, Comedies, and Adventure. Sadly, most television shows that air today suck, but thank goodness for TV on DVD.
• I also enjoy music, though I don't listen to it as much as I used to years ago. Specific genres include: Alternative, Rock, Hard Rock, 80's Pop/New Wave, and Punk. Though I can pretty much listen to any styles, except for: Rap, Hiphop, R&B, and "twangy" Country/Western.

I also used to be an artist, starting early in Elementary School until the end of High School, but haven't really drawn much since graduating. I was pretty good, even won some awards, but I'm afraid my talents have wavered after not being in use for so long. I don't like sports (such as football, basketball, etc.,) but some of the more laid-back ones (like miniature golf, bowling, etc.,) I don't mind playing. I used to bowl when I was a child, and even won a trophy.

Anyways, that's all I can think of to write about myself. I usually don't talk too deeply about myself, but I figured any good host should introduce what he's all about. I hope you enjoy my blog, I'm going to try my best to keep it updated regularly. I will be writing practically everything that happens in my life, everyone I talk to, what I happen to watch on television, and whatever happens to be going through my mind that day (and with thoughts like mine, it won't always be rosey,) so I may end up writing a lot some days and dragging on a bit... I wonder if the things I have to say could actually entertain people. Hey, I make no guarantees.

Actually, I do. I can promise I'll probably tick off quite a few people. I'm rather outspoken with my opinions, and in most cases or not, I'll say something that will probably offend someone. Like, if I say that I think (non-earlobe) piercings are unattractive, and you happen to have a pierced tongue or eyebrow, or whatever, just calm down, it's my opinion. (I wonder how many readers that just lost me. Hehe.) You can't please all the people all the time, and I'm not going to try to.

But, let's get this show on the road. Pleased to meet you, hope you guess my name.